Wow so this has been one hard, growing week, here in Langenhorn.
This week Sis Schaerr and I walked into a domestic violence situation that was pretty intense. As we got out of there the first thing that we did was call our Mission President to find out what to do. He called someone else, and then afterwards called us back. The advice he was given was to stay out of it, and walk away putting our safety above anything else.....you all know me well enough to know that is not what I would naturally do. As I fought my inner self, and followed the council of my mission president, I felt the Holy Spirit lifting my up, and comforting me That evening as we went back to our apartment I went in to the bathroom (the one place you can be alone in the mission field) and just sat there crying not know what I could do. After about an hour I walked out and went to check on Sis Schaerr. She was in the process of writing in a book of Mormon addressed to this man, with it ending as. 'I know that you are a son of God, and as you read in this Book the power of God will come into your life and you will realize who you are, and have the power to become that person.'' I have been thinking a lot about that since then. We also got the Liahona this week and there was a talk in there titled ''Love your enemys''. I have naturally been praying a lot for the women that we saw, but as I read that talk, I felt like God was telling me I was also suppose to learn to have love for the husband as well. I did not know where to start, not after seeing what we saw. I started a fast seeking the way that I was going to be able to develop this love, and also the strength to be able to do what I was asked. The next morning I opened my scriptures and I turned to the New Testament, not knowing what to read, but knowing that through my Saviors example I could find the answers I was looking for. I felt prompted to read about the Crucifixion in Luke 23
34 ¶Then asaid Jesus, Father, bforgive them; for they know not what cthey(JST Luke 23:35 … they do (Meaning the soldiers who crucified him,) …) do. And they parted his draiment, and cast lots.
I could imagine Christ laying on the cross, and as he looked up into the eyes of these soldiers and was able to see the hardness and the coldness that had developed, I could only imagine the sadness that he felt. Christ understood who these men where in the pre-earth life, the potently they had, and the life they would have had to live to develop this coldness. You guys I feel like I saw a little bit of that hardness, that coldness, in the eyes of the husband. But unlike Christ I started developing a hatred for this man, at moments so deep that I wish I could have seen him in the same pain that he had caused. I did not feel pity for him, I did not want to help him, I definitely did not feel love or compassion for this man, and the last thing I wanted to do was to pray for him. I wanted to see him in pain, just as much if not more then he had caused. However as I read these verses I felt an overwhelming love come over me that I can't explain for the husband of this women. I love that could only be from our Heavenly Father. Since that time that love has continued, and I don't know how to explain in, but through this I have been learning SO much . #1 It is critical to Follow the council of your priesthood leaders, it will keep you safe, and allow you to learn the lessens we need to. #2-God loves ALL of His children no matter what we do. #3- It is possible to love your enemy's. I am not saying I am any where perfect with this, I have alot more to work ok, but I am learning it is possible.Basically I have been learning ALOT this week, I have never felt the love of my heavenly father stronger then I have as I have strived to develop that unconditional love for another. I know God lives, I know it. I know that He loves us. He is standing by us through the good, the bad, the ugly. Christ lives, he loves us, he is able to love all of us because through the atonement he at one point was all of us. He was the beat up wife, he was the husband hitting. I love Him SOOO much. I know the atonement is real, and is deeper then any of us can understand!
I challenge you to look at those in your life that may have harmed you with that unconditional love Christ can offer.
I love you all so much! I hope all is going well back in the states.
Much Love,
Sis Kimberly Bohne
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